Sunday, May 22, 2011

A Short Summary of ESPN's Coverage of Cubs vs. Red Sox

Hey did you know that Fenway was built in 1912 and Wrigley was built in 1914?  Also this is the first time these teams have played each other at Fenway since 1918.  Also did you know the Cubs haven't won a World Series since 1908?  No, seriously.  1908.  That was the last time.  1908.  A lot of shit has happened since then.  I mean that's a really long time.  1908.  Fenway Park is old by the way.  It was built in 1912.  Two years before Wrigley was built.  Back in 1918 the Cubs and Red Sox played each other here in the World Series.  That was the last time the Red Sox won it until they won in 2004.  The Cubs though, they haven't won a World Series since 1908.  That's a really fucking long time guys.  Like really long.  GREEN MONSTER!  How unique.  This park is unique.  This park eats and shits history for breakfast.  History of the GAME!  The game of baseball.  The Red Sox play baseball at Fenway Park.  Fenway Park opened in 1912.  It's nearly 100 years old.  You know what's older than that?  The Cubs World Series drought.  You see, believe it or not.  The Cubs haven't won a World Series since 1908.  The only people that remember that series are fucking dead now.  So don't believe someone if they say they saw it.  Unless that person is a zombie of course.  Bobby Valentine is a zombie, what with that weird blonde hair now.  Bobby always had dark hair so the only explanation is that he's now the undead.  Maybe he was at the last World Series the Cubs won.  That was in 1908.  The Cubs have been cursed ever since.  1908.  That's like 4 years before Fenway Park was built.  Fenway was built in 1912, while Wrigley Field was built two years later.  Look at the Green Monster!

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